(no subject)

[graculus]

Don't you just hate it when you're happily reading a slash story and it's interesting, with well-written supporting original characters and a clever premise and then suddenly the protagonists are exchanging rings and getting married/bonded? Or is it just me that objects to grown men (or at least mostly-grown) losing all their semblance of a backbone and turning into blushing wannabe brides?

[Poll #750600]

Comments

[xochiquetzl]

While in theory I like the idea of fics showing committed relationships (which is probably why I like Established Relationship fics so much), in practice many are poorly done. Especially those with strongly heterosexualized tropes. Gay men do hold commitment ceremonies. They generally do not fight to the death over who gets to wear the dress and veil unless they are being tongue-in-cheek. ;)

The ones that bother me most are the ones that are very heterosexist--the ones that imply that only by imitating a male/female couple can a gay couple achieve happiness and fulfillment. Insert character A weeping because he can't give birth to character B's child here. :P

The thing about being queer to me (pulls out bi cred) is that there's a sense of having to make it all up as you go along. Character A may kind of want that white picket fence, but even if he gets it he's going to be aware that it's not intended for him. A wedding in the US or any other country that doesn't allow gay marriage is also going to have a kind of "Oh, yeah?" to it, rather than be an occasion for unalloyed conformist bliss. Even in countries that allow gay marriage, it's new enough that most of the participants will remember it not being allowed.

I know that many readers dislike including that kind of political reality in fic, but the truth is that most earth-based locations are not a queer utopia. Personally, I'm annoyed by stories that pretend that we DO live in some kind of queer utopia.

[graculus.livejournal.com]

Not being a guy, and indeed with most fic writers also not being guys, I remain to be convinced that the first thing that guys think of if they're about to get some hot man-on-man action is buying jewellery for their would-be shagger or shaggee. Because really, is that something that even m/f couples do that much any more, if ever?

It's like we've taken a step back in time and landed in the 1950's, where everyone's supposed to be a virgin till they meet The One and then that's it. To my mind, the line between 'sweet and cute' and 'ragingly camp and overdone' really isn't that thin, but people do seem to leap over it with alarming regularity...

[xochiquetzl]

Yes, it's not only that it's heterosexist. It's that it's heterosexist with retrogressive gender politics.

In theory, I think it's kind of sweet to buy your intended shaggee a nice, no-strings gift. In practice, a wedding or engagement ring is a bit much. ;)

[blktauna.livejournal.com]

Personally, I'm annoyed by stories that pretend that we DO live in some kind of queer utopia.

Thank you.

And btw... not _everyone_ is gay!!!!
O.o

The stories where men in an actual age of homophobia come out to everyone and everyone happily wishes them a wonderful life together....

*stabbity*

[graculus.livejournal.com]

My personal favourite has always been the series of sugar shock inducing Magnificent Seven stories where the token black guy in the show and one of the white guys shack up together and it's common knowledge to everyone in town, and then they start adopting random abandoned orphans and it's all kittens and rainbows. Uh huh. That's really accurate for the period in so many ways...

[blktauna.livejournal.com]

*Gags*

[graculus.livejournal.com]

Oh, it gets better! Then there's the story where one of our protagonists is abducted by aliens and gets pregnant, except that then he wakes up and finds it's all been a dream caused by his desperate desire to be a real woman to have babies for his (male) lover. Uh huh. *sporks repeatedly*

[xochiquetzl]

There's a Stargate story where they explain in a sentence or two that Jack and Daniel are married because the President likes Jack and said it was okay for them to get married and for Jack to stay in the Air Force married to a guy.

.................

[graculus.livejournal.com]

Hey, if it's good enough for the shippers... ;)

Of course, what everyone wants to know is this: did they get married on the gate ramp and did Jack wear the dress?

[xochiquetzl]

Of course they got married on the gate ramp! Hammond presided!

Daniel wore a simply fabulous ivory gown with an empire waist and a veil down to his ass. He carried a lovely bouquet of white roses and calla lillies.

Jack wore a white Edwardian bridal gown with a ten foot train, and a crown of daisies.

(She didn't specify any wedding details, and the plot worked without it, so I don't know why it was included. But the rest of the story was equally illogical.)

[graculus.livejournal.com]

(She didn't specify any wedding details, and the plot worked without it, so I don't know why it was included. But the rest of the story was equally illogical.)

Sounds to me like it was about validation - if the President himself says it's okay, then we don't have to worry about little things like homophobia, etc etc...

[nausica2.livejournal.com]

I think I've read the SGA version of that *gag*

I also love good Established Relationship fics, actually, the last SGA fic I've read is kind of a remake of The third man with a Established John/Rodney in the background that was just perfect, because it did feel very real. I like those fics, not the ones where we end up stuck in the gay version of the Stepford wives society. ;)

Gay marriage is a new thing. Heck, I live in a country where it is legal, and obviously our local TV shows are adapting to that. It's quite fascinating to see how it's embedded in local fiction. If it's something tricky when doing fiction set in a country where is legal, creating gay utopias doesn't help the narration, just as you point.