HBP - all spoilers behind the cut, honest!

[graculus]

My day so far:

7am - postie arrives with my copy of HBP. Go looking for torrents for Avalon and BSG premiere. Back to bed.

11am - get up, check livejournal, am amused by amount of squeeing about SG-1 already. Make coffee, watch download of Avalon. Enjoy immensely other than the moments of sheer blandness when the Destroyer of Episodes appears, which are far too frequent for my liking. Am looking forward to next week, and already not so much to when the D of E returns full-time.

12.30am - make lunch, start reading HBP.

3pm - check livejournal, make more coffee, go back to HBP.

5.15pm - finish HBP, brain still spinning.

So, that was interesting. I wonder if JKR decided it would be a good time to hit as many characters as possible with the heterosexuality stick in order to entertain herself? And I can only imagine the amount of entries Fandom Wank will be having over the next couple of weeks as the various enraged shipper elements whine or gloat, depending on their pairing of choice... I know it's mostly HP anyway but it's like JKR was trying to stir up as many people as possible.

My theory on the Snape thing? I know, I'm in serious denial, but I still don't believe he's OMGtehev0l!!11!!!!! Let's face it, the guy is a skilled Occlumens, as is Dumbledore, so both of them would have known that Dumbledore probably thought he was dying because of the potion he'd ingested (and nicely sadistic touch, JKR, making Harry the one to make him finish it off!). What exactly was Dumbledore asking Snape for when he said 'please'? If it was as straightforward as Harry currently believes, what missed angst potential!

Comments

[cara-chapel.livejournal.com]

*pets Snape on the head*

Good boy. <3

[graculus.livejournal.com]

:P

[katemonkey.livejournal.com]

I kept on snorting loudly each time another bit of fanon was crushed into tiny little pieces.

Finally, I had to go sit outside so that I'd quit bothering themongkey.

But it was WORTH IT!!!

[graculus.livejournal.com]

I was starting to wonder if JKR had a checklist:

Remus is gay
Harry loves Hermione
Snape invented Wolfsbane
Draco is a good guy really

And the list goes on... ;)

[lexin.livejournal.com]

That was brilliant.

Snape Manor: dead, and I dance on its grave with hobnailed boots

[xochiquetzl]

Oh, yes. I expect the howls of shipwars, and plan to keep my head down.

As for Snape, I'm in denial, too, but I still think it's ambiguous. I read the scene on the tower as, "You put me in this position, you bastard."

[graculus.livejournal.com]

Particularly when he's then running off with Draco (in the platonic sense) and doesn't take the opportunity to kill or kidnap Harry, who is clearly no match for Snape since we now know much of what he's learned this year Snape invented.

Oh, and Lupin is apparently straight (or at least bi) - who knew? ;)

[cara-chapel.livejournal.com]

I think he's ambiguous too. *waves the 'I still love Snape' flag*

[katyabaturinsky.livejournal.com]

when the Destroyer of Episodes appears

Okay, because I am hopelessly out of the loop when it comes to SG-1 snarking, please identify same? (So that I may mock appropriately.)

[graculus.livejournal.com]

AKA the 'National Treasure', owner of the Breasts of Doom, maker of cow-eyes at her boss, and are you getting the idea yet? ;)

[nausica2.livejournal.com]

I have just finished it and... whoa. We had this dinner yesterday, and so many of the things mentioned have been answered or appeared in the book, and not exactly in the way we thought.

Dude, fandom is going to go up in flames, and JKR is going to have SO much fun with that, I bet.

[xochiquetzl]

I saw several shipwrecks. I actually think mine got off light.

[gategrrl.livejournal.com]

Wow, you guys. I'm not in the HP fandom at ALL, and I'm boggled! I *was* going to pick the book up later today, but I think I'll do it sooner. I need a brief change from Stephen King, I think.

Snape runs off with the blond Slitherin harridan and has mistaught Harry all year, AND murders Dumbledore?????? OMFG. Snape! And here I thought he was a closet hero in the making.

[graculus.livejournal.com]

Snape runs off with the blond Slitherin harridan and has mistaught Harry all year, AND murders Dumbledore?

It's a little more complicated than that... ;)

[cycnus39]

*murders HP and hides body in shed*

[graculus.livejournal.com]

Awww, poor Harry! :(

[blktauna.livejournal.com]

You lot know she's reading the fan fic and doing all this to wind you up...

[graculus.livejournal.com]

Having seen the amount of fanon she killed off in this book alone, I wouldn't be at all surprised if she had a checklist by her computer as she wrote it... ;)

[captain-tiv.livejournal.com]

I haven't bought the book, there's not a book anywhere around here for me to flip through and get the gist of the story, I"ve read through every post here and I still have absolutely no clue what's going on!

What's happened in the book?

I'm no involved in any HP fandom, so what's going up in flames?

Inquiring minds want to know. :)

[graculus.livejournal.com]

Lots of stuff happened, JKR systematically wiped out large numbers of fanon standbys, pissed off many segments of both shippers and slashers, and set things up for a fantastic conclusion (I hope) in book 7, though she's making me think she's going to off Snape in some kind of heavy-handed redemption drama at the end. Pffft.

[penfold-x.livejournal.com]

I may be Charlie Brown to JKR's Lucy, but I'm with you. I just don't buy that Snape is a triple agent. I realize that clinging to this thought is just giving her another change to punch me in the gut in a year or three, but I can't help it.

Harry is sure Dumbledore is right about the Horcruxes, so sure of everything about Dumbledore, except this. I don't think Dumbledore would have accepted Snape back without real, undeniable proof. And nothing Harry saw, while being damning, is irrefutable. I think that, perhaps, Snape told Dumbledore about the Unbreakable Vow after it happened, and perhaps even that the "please" was "please do what we agreed you'd do in this circumstance." I'm not saying that Snape isn't a petty bastard (that's part of his charm) as the conversation outside of Hagrid's hut proves. In fact, the only thing that I don't see smoothing into this theory is that Snape takes the time outside of the hut to be a petty bastard about Harry's dad. Come the Hell on, Severus. I can see you being mad at being called a coward when you'd just done something that took a lot of courage to do, but let go of your effing teenaged angst already.

[graculus.livejournal.com]

"Nobody's that good an actor, not even Snape." Straight from the horse's mouth. ;)

Also, oh the bucketloads of angsty Snape/Harry possibilities once it all unwinds, by which time Harry will have left school and will be no longer jailbait! Mmmmm. :)

[chance1562.livejournal.com]

Am feeling the full on hatred for Snape right now, but as I posted in my own "omgwtffinishedthebook!!" entry: I may eat those words later. Right now though, I revel in my hate.

[graculus.livejournal.com]

Awww, poor Snapey. :(

Hate to say it, but I think JKR is setting things up for Snape-is-redeemed and proven to be a Good Guy After All (If Shallow and Vindictive With It) in book 7. I shall, alas, be very surprised if he survives... :(

OT request

[penfold-x.livejournal.com]

Would you look up for me the page in the Brit version where the Astronmy Tower "please" moment takes place?

Re: OT request

[graculus.livejournal.com]

Bottom of p556.