Their logic is not like our earth logic...

[graculus]

This is just so priceless that I wanted to share it with you all... as you may or may not know, the lovely xochiquetzl and I run All Daniel Fic, which is a fanfic archive for stories featuring the character of Daniel Jackson from Stargate SG-1. Het, slash or gen, we're happy to accept anything that's reasonably coherent as long as it's Daniel-centric.

So, back in February this year we get an email that goes like this:

dear michael shanks you are one of the hottest actors on the showstargatesg1 well i waswondering if you are single or not?? well you are so cute that last night i was watching a rerun of your show and i was blushing if you want you can call me at
[telephone number] you are very handsome Michael Shanks
From your fan [full name] i live in [address]


Yes, an email to a fanfic archive complete with telephone number, complete name and partial address. We reply to said nutjob telling her that we're a fanfic archive and therefore don't have any contact with Michael Shanks, and she really shouldn't be sending out her contact details to all and sundry.

We get a reply:

i am so happy that michael shanks plays dr.danel jackson. he is a great actor on the show stargate sg1 well i hope that he is still on the show well michael shanks you are very handsome from your fan [full name] [telephone number] have a great day

Then, about 2 hours later (in response to our further 'go away crazy person and stop sending people your personal details' email):

well can you please send me a signed autograph of Michael Shanks picture i am a huge fan of the show stargate sg1
[full name]
[full postal address, including zip code] thank you from [name]
[email address, in case we'd missed it] [phone number]


We decide that the best way to deal with this is to ignore it. Then today, 7 months later and out of the blue, we get another email (in orange text on a dark green background no less):

well i was wondering if i can meet michael shanks i know he is taken but i am a fan of him and the show stargate sg1 from [name] [email address] call me at [telephone number] okay well have a nice day.



*headdesk*

Comments

[seanchaidh.livejournal.com]

*snerks* Determined, isn't she?

[graculus.livejournal.com]

I love the way she apparently thinks that now, after 7 months, we'll turn round and go 'okay then, we do know Shanks really and we'll tell him you want him to call you!'. Jeez.

[seanchaidh.livejournal.com]

Well, I met him briefly at Toronto Trek, does that count? No introductions were actually done and he just signed a picture for a friend. So OF COURSE I could pass on.... *snerks* Nah, it's just too silly!

[graculus.livejournal.com]

Somehow I think he's a little too busy to be calling every nutjob who'd like to hear from him anyway... but clearly the fact we're running an archive where the character he plays is involved proves we have a hotline to the Shanks! ;)

[seanchaidh.livejournal.com]

If he replied to every nutjob, he'd have no time for acting. :)

[lovellama.livejournal.com]

Well, just in case you ever do start arranging meetings with Michael, I'msecondinline. ;D

[graculus.livejournal.com]

I think you'd have more chance if you emailed us. ;)

[sg1scribe.livejournal.com]

Clearly your denial that you knew him was a test to see if she was a 'true fan'.

PS. I've been waiting for ten years for you to decide I'm a true fan. Can I have his phone number now?

[gategrrl.livejournal.com]

*snickers*

Why not just send her the URL for a Convention page at Creation Con's website? And one for an autographed photograph. The dimwit probably has no idea who much they cost (especially if she's a high school student, which is what those emails sound like).

[graculus.livejournal.com]

If you were a true fan, you'd already have his phone number! :P

[graculus.livejournal.com]

Since she's clearly functionally illiterate, if her lack of understanding of our previous emails is concerned, what would be the point? She'd probably turn up at the convention in question and expect to get in for free, because she'd been sent an invitation by Michael Shanks himself! ;)

[gategrrl.livejournal.com]

ROFL -- good point. How weird she thinks of you guys as a touchstone for Shanks.

[sg1scribe.livejournal.com]

Doh! Foiled again.

*g*

[nausica2.livejournal.com]

LOL, nice try!

I would suggest telling her that if she wrote to the studio she'd probably get a pic, but I don't think Michael Shanks needs that kind of fan mail...

[aizjanika.livejournal.com]

LOL I have a website that is a virtual collection of, well, collectibles for a particular show. I state on my website very clearly that it is not a store, that I have no items for sale, blah blah blah, and yet I still get emails asking how much something is and asking why I don't have prices on my website. I haven't updated this site in at least four years either, and just yesterday I got two more emails asking me how to buy certain items.

Even at that website, I have received emails from people thinking that they're writing to the actor, but even better are the ones from people thinking they are writing to the character. *g*

Fun stuff. *g* The contact details are an especially nice touch. heh

[graculus.livejournal.com]

It's the sheer persistence that makes this particular nutjob so very special, I think...

Fun stuff. *g* The contact details are an especially nice touch. heh

Well, now his show's been canned, I'm sure Shanks would have nothing better to do than phone up random teenagers? ;)

[penfold-x.livejournal.com]

You *don't* have MS's phone number? I've been paying you on the installment plan for years! You truly are evil.

[xochiquetzl]

*facepalm*

[ellid.livejournal.com]

*pets and offers cluestick*

[aizjanika.livejournal.com]

Well, now his show's been canned, I'm sure Shanks would have nothing better to do than phone up random teenagers? ;)

hehe And hopefully 45-year-old women? *g*